Hear me out on this one, because I have lived with depression for a long time. For me, medication wasn’t really that effective, so I really had to max out on many other things – things which I could change. In the 2 years or so that I was at my lowest point, I discovered a few things about how to make myself feel happy, when I felt really sad inside. I’d like to share some of those with you today.
You will have heard of some of these no doubt, but my hope is that you find something a little different, which you haven’t tried before. Doing these things have helped me eliminate 75% of my depression medication.
1. Ask yourself this question…
If you’re feeling sad, you will need to be very intentional by purposely doing activites to brighten up your day. It isn’t easy, but practice certainly helps. If you don’t know where to start, ask yourself this question…
“If I was happy, what would I be doing”?
This question is important because it shifts your mind to a more positive state, and also gives you something to focused on. In hypnotherapy circles, we call this the Law of Concentrated Attention.
2. Surround yourself with the right people
We all have friends, family and colleagues who lift us up when we’re having a difficult day, and some who present an additional challenge.
3. Spend time in nature
Leaving your home can feel overwhelming at first, especially when it’s been a while since you left the relative sanctuary of your home. If the thought of leaving your home fills you with dread, start small. You could start by just going to the door and peering out, maybe sit on the step for 5 minutes, or walk to your front gate. Extend this every day and you’ll be well on your way to enjoying nature.
If you don’t have a garden, spend 5 minues in a park, and work up from there.
Start off small and don’t feel guilty if it’s only 2 or 3 minutes. The objective at first is just to build that routine into your everyday life.
These little things that make us happy also increase our resilience to life’s ups and downs. If you’re struggling and feel overwhelmed, focus on your senses.
Really notice the texture of objects and notice how the light and shadows form on and around the item. When you’re done that, notice what you can hear. The constant noises and the intermittent noises. Consider what’s making the noises. Do the same with your sense of smell and touch. What are you seeing? What can you hear? When I do this, I’m usually much calmer after going through those structured questions. This usually lifts my mood too.
4. Focus on the positive aspects of your life
Some people find it helpful to keep a gratitude journal, whilst others just ask themselves “what am I grateful for today”? It’s a matter of personal preference.
Make it fun, so you’re more likely to stick with it. Get some pretty paper and a wacky or colourful pen. Draw doodles on the pages. Just enjoy the process.
Focusing on what you do have can be very beneficial to somebody’s mood. A while ago, I found an old gratitude journal and as I was flicking through it, I noticed it covered the day my mum died. I turned to the day she died and found this.
I’m grateful for a dad, sister and husband, who all love me very much. I am grateful for the close friendship that I had with my mum, and her constant encouragement as I navigated a really challenging time in my life.
I felt so profoundly empty inside on that day, but I still managed to find something to be grateful for. And you can too.
5. Find small things that pick you up
When I was at my lowest, I tried all sorts of things to pick myself up, but nothing made a huge difference. What did help though (and where I went wrong initially) is remembering that no single thing is likely to make a huge difference. However, using multiple strategies can work much better. So instead of moving from one idea to the next, add to what you’re already doing. Lots of little wins, really can make a difference.
6. Know that your past does not define your future
I’d also like to share something else I discovered when I crawled out of the other side of depression. That being your past does not define your future. Just because you’re sad now, does not mean that you will always be sad.
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